//TODO: Refactor to use Local Font
by: Rea von Känel

on: 17.02.2019

Why do we have Children?

by: Rea von Känel

on: 17.02.2019

Call to all women:
Take your needs seriously!

I work as a kindergarten teacher and every morning I have nineteen 4-6 year olds around me who all want or need something. 

How did I end up here?
I never learned to take my needs seriously myself and eventually suppressed them. I have used my will to be strong, to show no weakness - and so I have repressed my needy part, pushed it away and yet it has unconsciously made its way back into my life.

In my case - and probably in many other cases in kindergarten, toddler care or even with mothers - it led to me becoming a kindergarten teacher. A job in which there are only needs and neediness around me. 

And I convinced myself  that I have no problem with this.

Absurd, isn't it?
A person (me) who has a real problem perceiving his own needs, let alone satisfying them - looks after 19 children daily who have a lot of needs.

Do you think anyone can be a good teacher in a subject, like mathematics, if he didn't understand mathematics himself, let alone used it in his life?
Why should the needs be different?

So I will most likely do the same as it did in my childhood. I will probably not recognize the true needs of many children...so they will learn: not to take their needs seriously, to push them away and to pass them on to the next generation...

That is why I write these lines.
To shake up - look closely.
Start with yourself.
I am one of many kindergarten teachers.
The same applies to mothers:

Why do we have or want children? 
Is it the need for safety?
...to always be loved afterwards?
...or so that your partner stays with you?
...doesn't your job suit you (anymore)?

The moment we say yes to a child, we say yes to a job in which we have to satisfy the needs of our children around the clock, because they really can't do it themselves yet.

Can you do it yourself?
Can you take care of your own needs?
Do you know what you want and need?
Can you only satisfy your needs for a whole day/week/month or year?

If the answer is no, how will you teach it to your children?
So let's take our needs seriously.

...if we don't do it already: Let's start now!